I think this suit for YOU and ME

Living life wouldn't mean that you have to do things right... to have eternal life after that
Living life would mean that you have to live it the way you want it, the way you think is right...
What I am babbling about?
SHE is the only reason for this...
Just her
Then why God's definition of love so different from everyone else's?
How can it be so different from mine?
When we all know that...
It simply... feels good... to love...
See...
Everything about me...
My whole body, my mind, my heart, my soul, my whole being points out to this person and tells me that what I'm feeling is not a lie
How can that be so bad in the eyes of so many?
And in the eyes of God?
I just don't get it
I was thinking...
Maybe it would have been better and easier if it was someone else...
But the thing is -- it's not
Why does it have to be her?
Why does it have to be ONLY her?
I'm going to be completely honest and spare myself from being dissillusioned
I just want..
ONE DAY to be with her...
Just one day...
That's all...
Nothing more, nothing less
I just want to be able to live that moment again...
To let my heart feel an overflow of emotions...
Is that too much to ask?

From Rome to Juliet... In Rome & Juliet
[Just wanted to share ** No copyright infringement intended**]

Hush Hush By PCD - Just a few of the words describe me much-check the red words

I never needed you to be strong
I never needed you for pointing out my wrongs
I never needed pain, I never needed strain
My love for you was strong enough, you should have known

I never needed you for judgements
I never needed you to question what I spent
I never asked for help, I take care of myself
I don't know why you think you gotta hold on me

And it's a little late for conversations
There isn't anything for you to say
And my eyes hurt, hands shiver,
So look at me and listen to me
Because

I don't want to stay another minute
I don't want you to say a single word
Hush hush, hush hush
There is no other way, I get the final say because
I don't want to do this any longer
I don't want you, there's nothing left to say
Hush hush, hush hush
I've already spoken, our love is broken
Baby hush hush

I never needed your corrections
On everything from how I act to what I say
I never needed words, I never needed hurt
I never needed you to be there every day

I'm sorry for the way I let go
On everything I wanted when you came along
But I ain't never beatin', broken not defeated
I know next to you is not where I belong

Always With You

Ini kali pertama aku memiliki rasa cinta dalam hati
Ini kali pertama aku merasa ada cinta dalam diri
Ini kali pertama pula aku mencoba untuk mencintai

Cinta yang tak mungkin mampu tergapai, sekalipun waktu sudah berlalu
Cinta yang hanya bisa kusimpan, entah sampai kapan
Sampai waktu berkata bahwa aku sudah cukup menggila

Demi cinta ini aku sudah siap untuk terluka
Aku sudah siap untuk terjatuh
Aku sudah siap untuk terhempas
Tapi aku tidak ingin kehilangan DIA

Tuhan... Jangan biarkan dia pergi dari kehidupanku
Meski hanya sebatas rasa hati, biar aku mampu menatapnya
dan memastikan bahwa DIA baik-baik saja

Tuhan... hancurkan saja hatiku dan buat nama DIA terhapus dari hatiku
Tapi jangan cabut dia dari sisiku, biar dia selalu bersamaku
sekalipun dirinya bukan milikku

Sentuhan DIA terasa nyata dalam diriku, sekalipun hanya sebatas mimpi
Tapi realita menamparku di pagi hari...
Aku bukan miliknya, dan dia bukan milikku
Semua itu hanya bayang semu yang tercipta dalam angan semata

Seseorang menuliskan beberapa kalimat di dalam blog-nya...
Dan ini... untukmu... Hanya untukmu seorang...
Kamu yang kucintai...
Satu-satunya insan yang pernah kucintai dengan segenap hatiku
Satu-satunya individu yang mampu membuatku menggila...
Aku pernah jatuhkan setetes air mata di selat Sunda. Di hari aku bisa menemukannya lagi, itulah waktunya aku berhenti mencintaimu.

Hold my words...
I'll let every people knows how I felt about you...
But...
I'll never let you know...
As long as you happy and good...
So I'm good...
Nothing more, nothing less...

But I'll always be with you...
I LOVE YOU

I Hate Clubbing!!!

Di suatu malam yang dingin di malam Minggu... gw memutuskan to be with my friend yet my business partner. I care for her much, so very much... And I want to be with her that night, for some reason I can't explain here.

I did fight with my mum and dad about going at night and I lied... And then I go.

Our plans was having a nice chit chat at Kemang Food Festival, examine a few things about the menu and such... then go back to hotel in a nice and calm ambience, open a bottle of wine or two then having a girls talk. That was the plan....

But then everything change, she told me: we'll have some wine and then you go with me to the club! We'll party all night long!!!

What the.... I'm speechless, and again... because I do care about her, I agree. We having a fine wine at Amor Cafe Kemang, we open to bottle and I drank two glass. Her friend, Ais... is a nice man, he have a task from my friend to make me smile and I told him; carefull, I'm not easy... He smile.

Then he asked me if I want to smoke some marijuana, I told him NO and he explain; to make me smile I have to smoke marijuana. I told him NO, NO, NO and NO again, he surrender. No smoke marijuana, wine? Fine... those out of that?? NO.

After that, we go to Blowfish Kitchen & Bar at Menara Mulia, the clock was showing 1 am in the morning. Damn.... I hate to go the place like this... but again, I do this for her...

Inside...

FUCK! Too many people, too many dirty minds, too crowded and the music was too loud. But then, she give her hand to me and ask me not to let her go.

Honestly speaking??? I HATE THAT NIGHT!

I was stand over the bar, looking at people... and laughing at them... I was even think to kill someone, and think nobody will knew... since there're so many people inside. And I haven't seen anyone that have different color. Someone that different, everybody look the same in my eyes... Black and grey... No matter how nice their dress or clothes... they all look the same....

"Tequila???" No, I said... but her friends make me drink it, she stare at me and wouldn't allowed me drink that tequila. I tasted it a little, bitter and salty... phewww... don't like it at all. And then, she drink mine...

Ais gave me a glass of coke, I smile and smoke my Dunhill Menthol, just looking into people minds and get me angry.... I try to stay and not to let my guard down... Once I slip, I'll be over...

"Duh... masa kesini gak minum apa2 sih??? Tequila gak mau, beer juga gak mau, trus apa dong???? Jangan bilang lo minum coke doang..." I just smile...

And then my friend told her friends; "She don't drink alcohol, just wine..."

Two bottle of wine being served and I drank another 5 glass, I fell down! But I still aware, I just felt really dizzy, confused and soooooo fuckin' sleepy... It was 5am in the morning [God forgive me... I wouldn't do anything like this anymore....]

Ais whisper in my ears; "Gw belum selese sama lo, gw belum bisa bikin lo ketawa... dan sekarang kita mau pindah tempat, ke Stadium ya... kita open room, private..."

PROTES BERAT!!! No Stadium!!!!

"Tenang aja, cuma kita2 doang kok... lo boleh gak usah minum apa2 lagi, cuma lo kasih gw kesempatan buat bikin lo ketawa."

Ok, whatever... I lost her hand already, and I'm all over the alcohol in my head... The hell with you people!! Just let me sleep!!!

I was driving all around the city, I don't care... I babbling too much, and being a sleepy head. They go to the Stadium and thanks God... the room was fully booked, so we go to Boutique Hotel. Ais was with me all night, he stay with me always... and makes me feel comfortable, even tough I don't really care about what he's talking.

He's the one that told us no room can be used, he's the one that buy something from Stadium... I don't know and I don't care...

At boutique hotel...

I just fell down and sleep, I hate the music... then I have her hand again... She's all over me... I don't really felt comfortable there, she hug me tight and whisper in my ear to say sorry... I don't know what to say, all I care is I have her hand back... I felt asleep, and I just want her to hug me and not to let me go... I don't care about the other... I was there because of her, because I want to be there with her... nothing more.

We out from the hotel at 10.15 am in the morning... she felt a little bit dizzy, and I have my 90% brain again. I drove her car out from the hotel and go to her house... We arrived at 11am...

Gezzz.... what a day...

She say sorry to me again, and I asked her: Still want me to go to the club another time?? She smiled and say no... Good, thanks God...

"Did you enjoyed the night?" She asked.
"Honestly?"
"Yes."
"No." I said it out and loud, her face became sulk.
"I just want you to be happy... because you stressed out and too much keeping the problem within yourself... I just want you to be happy." She said, so... that's was the reason why... I smiled.
"Are you happy Bree? Because as long as you happy, I'm too... that's the reason why I'm there..."
"Not really... Something is missing..."
"Hmm... can I hug you?" I asked, she spread her hands and invite me.

She gave a me a little massage to my head, she knows that I need it, I drank 7 glass of wine and I admit it... I'm drunk... I just sleep in her chest and listen to what she said...

I love her... and I do care about her... Looks like I know her for a long time... even though she have a different way to having fun, she's a nice person though... A real one.

"If I stressed out, I go to cafe... I eat, smoke and drink coffee, then I read a lot of book or browsing the internet. Wine is fine too... That's how I spent my nightmare or my bad day..." I said.

"I will never take you to that place anymore... You don't belong there and I know why you scared..." She said.

Do not worry Bree... I do having fun, in a different way... cause now I know how to effectively kill someone in crowded place, especially in bar or in the room... Hahahahahahaha... easy to do darling, too bad I was still in ME.... Not in the other mode...

My heart... maybe says...

GOOD IS GOOD
by. Sheryl Crow



Good is good and bad is bad
You don’t know which one you had
She put your books out on the sidewalk
Now they’re blowing ‘round
They won’t help you when you’re down

Love’s on your list of things to do
To bring your good luck back to you
And if you think that everything’s unfair
Would you care if you’re the last one standing there

And everytime you hear the rolling thunder
You turn around before the lightening strikes
And does it ever make you stop and wonder
If all your good times pass you by

I don’t hold no mystery
But I can show you how to turn the key
Cause all I know is where I started
So downhearted
And that’s not where you want to be

And everytime you hear the rolling thunder
You turn around before the lightening strikes
And you could find a rock to crawl right under
If all your good times pass you by

When the day is done
And the world is sleeping
And the moon is on its way to shine
When your friends are gone
You thought were so worth keeping
You feel you don’t belong
And you don’t know why

And everytime you hear the rolling thunder
You turn around before the lightening strikes
And does it ever make you stop and wonder
If all your good times pass you by

When the day is done
And the world is sleeping
And the moon is on its way to shine
When your friends are gone
You thought were so worth keeping
You feel you don’t belong
Neither do I

What I Felt Right Now -Eps. 1

WHAT HURTS THE MOST
by. Rascal Flatts



I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

Not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do